Firstly, I must point out that I also fall into this category, although, technically, most of us actually fall into the ‘almost no longer middle-aged’ category but we’re going for the ‘almost 50’ is the new ‘almost 40’ approach…
Today’s session saw a number of casualties before we even started; Mrs P was a non starter as she ‘had a poorly chest’, however, upon further questioning (in the coffee shop post-session, yes, she dug deep and made it for refreshments) it transpired she was suffering from Limoncello poisoning, a terrible affliction among weak-willed middle-aged women apparently.
Then there was Lady H, who despite living in the UK operates in another time zone, which is approximately 20 minutes behind CET. She alleged she was ‘woken’ early by her husband and then something happened (of which she would not speak) which rendered her too exhausted to arrive at the session on time…
The there’s our Woman of International Travel, Mrs Other Side of the Pond, who was kind enough to post pictures pre-session of the beach in Miami, cocktails in Miami, summer dress wearing in Miami and wall-to-wall sunshine IN MIAMI!! Yes, we get the picture!
Which left just 6 people to moan at me. I love being moaned at. I really do. No, really. Why else would I want to coach? Cue the following protestations:
“Arghh!, running down hill encourages my breasts to say hello to my eyes!”
“Arghh running down hill makes my wee a come out when it’s not really ready to!”
“Arghhh running down hill makes my face skin wobble!”
And you know what I hear?
“Bla, bla, bla, bla, bla”
Because at the end of every session they stand there (smelling slightly of wee) euphoric that their middle-aged bodies have in fact survived and their arses have not headed any further south!